Ah!!bugger...

Hey, I promise to keep this one sober.  There is a heaviness in the air and it is getting to me badly. Life is in a state of perpetual hangovers. Take today for example, I wake up, knowing I've grossly overslept, body aching, my head heavy, the solitary leg that managed to escape the shackles of the blanket in the dead of the night, did not get far before succumbing to the cold, and oh, the lethargy, in Bengali we have a wonderful word to describe that feeling very aptly, "Lyadh" (the phonetic spelling is debatable). But the lyadh that is taking over my life, is very irksome. There was a time, when I actually enjoyed doing absolutely nothing. Now ironically, I've spent so much of my time doing nothing, that I'm now pretty fed up of doing nothing, but my ineptitude at doing anything, leads to the hopeless feeling of being stuck to doing nothing. Did that make sense? I hope it did, I did say I'd keep this sober. So it has been six months since I ...

The soft gurgle of the brook, the water lapping up against the rocks, pristine, clear. I see the sky in it, as it is above me, blue, serene and endless. The swirl of smoke rises into the dreary darkness, my fingers trace patterns in them as I lay here. The night envelops all around me, the walls, imposing in their might, holding me, crushing me. The soft cool breeze flows like the waves along the green grass where I sit, I feel it coming to me, cradling me in a soft embrace before passing me by, it dances before my eyes, in little spiral gusts, lifting me. The road ahead is bleak, I cannot see, only the whispers echo through them, calling me out. There are monsters, monsters who reside in the dark labyrinth of my mind, they talk to me, the lead me on into the abyss, they whisper in my ear, drag me, hold me, and they'll never let me go